Dear Single Christian,
A very difficult road to walk is the one of a long time single Christian. You often walk into church alone. Pastors give many sermons about fixing marriages and blessing marriages. Not a lot of sermons are on being single too often. Your friends plan couple nights, leaving you out. You might have moments where you feel lonely, lost and abandoned. There may be times you question God, why? But if there is one thing I want you to remember from this, is you are not any less spiritual, or less loved by God just because you are not married.
God loves you
Throughout my walk with Christ I’ve had many different emotions toward being in a relationship. I have had seasons where I am 100% content with where I am in life. There are times where I am disappointed. I think my life should be different at times. I’ve been happy and trustful of Gods plans, I’ve been upset and questioned him. Ultimately, he always reminds me of the same thing, He loves me deeply. Your relationship status is not indicative of Gods’ love for you, Jesus Is. If you feel that God doesn’t love you because he hasn’t blessed you with a spouse then maybe you need to redefine how God shows his love.
“Love consists in this: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the atoning sacrifice for our sings.” 1 John 4:10 CSB
You aren’t less of a Christian
The church has a way of glorifying marriage. Sometimes, to the point where it feels like a promotion in Christianity. Getting married is not your “I’ve arrived” moment. You are not any less of a Christian, any less in touch with God, any less loved over your friend who is married. So we must stop coveting marriage as an end goal of our life. Paul encourages us that being single is better. Being single allows you to focus on God and what he has for your life. Married people have their interest divided, but the single person may focus fully on God in a different way.
“I want you to be without concerns. The unmarried man is concerned about the things of the Lord – how he may please the Lord. But the married man is concerned about things of the world – how he may please his wife. And his interest are divided.” 1 Corinthians 7: 32-34 CSB
God has plans for you
It is possible that God has things to work out in your heart before he can hand it over to love someone else. Also possible, is God has things for you to accomplish before marriage. He has things for you to do before your interest is divided. It may also be possible, you are just meant to be single. Being single is okay. It may be a tough pill to swallow for some people. Either way, you must focus on where you are and what you have right now. Sit down and ask yourself, what is God currently doing in my heart? What is God doing with me in my family, career and friends? Look to see what God is doing, get on his plan, and trust him.
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At the end of the day it comes down to one word, contentment. God wants you to be content with where he has you relationally. If you are not content with where God has you, then you are not content with his plans for your life. And his plans are far better than any plan you will come up with. If you are a married person that decided to read this, I hope this helps you understand your single friend, or use it to encourage someone you know.
“I don’t say this out of need, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I find myself.” Philippians 4:11 CSB
Sincerely, a Fellow Single Christian