The Message Sex Sends


No matter what the context is, there is a message that sex sends. Are you communicating messages of love and trust, or of selfishness and lust? Our culture is over sexualized and we believe so many lies about it even down to the belief that it makes the other person feel loved by pressing for it. Asking for sex before marriage does not communicate love, in fact, it communicates the opposite of love.

Sex before marriage sends a message that I am NOT willing to wait for anything.

If either person in the relationship is constantly pushing for sex, they are communicating this truth. Whether that’s your intention or not, that’s what the other person will hear. It’s constantly sending the message that I care more about my immediate desires than I do you, I want this now, and I won’t wait.

If we cannot learn to make sacrifices in our dating relationships then how is a marriage ever going to work? Two different people, from two different backgrounds are going to have to make sacrifices and compromise in order to have a healthy relationship. Learn to love each other without it. Communicate that they are valuable and worth the wait.

Sex before marriage sends a message that your body is more valuable to me than your soul.

I lust you… I mean, I love you. We get these mixed up pretty often don’t we? While physical attraction is a big motivator for who we choose to date it can’t be all we have going for us. We need to place value on the soul of our partner. What are we doing to build them up, how are we strengthening them? We need to place value on it, and then we need to show them we value their soul above their body.

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How? Waiting for sex is obviously a big one. Take interest in their spiritual life, pray for and with them. Read the Bible together, and most importantly, love them like you love yourself. Give them the best you can, treat them with honor and respect. Show them they are significant, and that they are more than just a body. They were not made to make you happy, they were made to be on a team with you. If you expect them to make sacrifices for you then you’d better be willing to do the same.  Love them as a whole, don’t just take the parts you like.

Sex Is…

Natural, Designed by God, and Designed for a Purpose

Sex Is Not…

Casual, Self Satisfying, or Unnatural

Sex is a valuable gift, and it needs to be treated that way. There are a thousand messages that are being communicated to you by media and when you start on that path you’re communicating thousands of messages to your significant other. Pay close attention to the messages you’re sending. Show your partner you care about them, and not just their body. If you’re married, teach these values to your children, they need to understand the value of sex, and why it’s supposed to be saved.

Written by Mikey Romero

My mission is to communicate the word of God to the world, through an accessible platform, to change lives. My calling is to teach the word of God, whether in the pastorate, or through social media and blogging. I write to inspire.

8 thoughts on “The Message Sex Sends

  1. Pingback: The Most Asked Relationship Questions - Relationship Advice
  2. On June 1st, Lucy and I will celebrate fifty very happy, purpose filled, years of marriage. We too “Waited” until after the “I DO” and I am glad “WE DID”. We have certainly made up for it since then. We still enjoy a very active sex life and are both happy and healthier for it… I am saddened by the way our entire society has managed to turn sex into a marketing tool and cheapened the entire process. We are all affected by the lack of gentility in our lives. I for one am sick and tired of hearing – “It’s not a problem.” instead of a very warm and totally different meaning of the words “You are welcome”… You can check us out at We are now following “Daily PS”…

  3. Great word man! A lot of wisdom here. My wife and I waited to have sex until we were married… It was a huge blessing and really helped set our marriage off on the right foot. Most people hate their first year, we loved it!

  4. Great post Mikey. “Two different people, from two different backgrounds are going to have to make sacrifices and compromise in order to have a healthy relationship.”

    Sex clouds judgment and prevents people, in my opinion, from learning the true person. Healthy relationships are built on trust, honesty, forgiveness, communication and respect.

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