Finding a good relationship these days is the equivalent of traversing a mine field. One miss-step to the left or to the right, and bad things happen. Tread carefully, and make it to the end – and you have one of the greatest rewards that this life offers. The truth is that your spouse is the most important choice you can make. Behind every great man or woman is a great spouse – therefor, it is imperative to be able to identify the good ones. In today’s blog, I intend on listing 5 qualities with which you can identify good candidates for a relationship. Let’s begin!
1. A genuine love for Jesus. I couldn’t write this blog without adding this! But, here’s my own unique twist – there is a difference between love and passion. Passion is driven by fleeting emotions, while love is much deeper, and much more stable. A person who loves Jesus has walked through some adversity, some trials, and some highs. That person has seen God in all seasons, and consistently chosen to pursue Him. The first quality to look for is a genuine love of God.
2. Equally yoked. Choosing a partner who is equally yoked to yourself is vital for success. You want a partner who has a relationship with God that is equivalent to yours. You also want them to have similar levels of maturity and wisdom. In marriage, two people become the sum of eachother. When two people who are equally yoked are married, their growth multiplies, as they both grow and learn from eachother’s growth.
3. Examine their potential. Look at the potential and trajectory of a person. Where are they headed in life, what goals do they have, and are they actively pursuing growth every single day? Some of this can be hard to ascertain before you actually date a person, but that’s why we have Facebook, where people post all the details of their lives! So get to it, and stalk away. Most of us reading this blog are young adults, and almost none of us know where we will end up in our 30’s. Look for a partner that has potential, is on a good trajectory, and is actively growing.
4. Examine their character. This plays off of equally yoked and potential, but deserves its’ own mention. Character is a very important trait to look for before dating anybody. How do they act when nobody’s looking? Are they humble? Do they boast? How do they treat the people around them? Do they serve others or do they serve themselves? A careful examination of character is important while considering any partner.
5. Who do they surround themselves with? We are basically the sum of the people we surround ourselves with – I’m sure we have all heard a sermon or two on this, but it’s very true. One of the best ways to figure out who somebody is and what they represent is to look at who they are friends with. Do they surround themselves with responsible people with integrity and good values? If so, chances are that the person you’re crushing on has all of those things as well. If that person hangs around irresponsible party animals, well… sorry, but you know where this is going.
There you have it! Five qualities to look for when looking for a partner! Relationships are tricky, but a God honoring relationship is an absolute thing of beauty. When looking for a partner, ask yourself; Do they genuinely love Jesus? Are we equally yoked? Where are they headed in life? What is their character like? And finally, who are they friends with? With these five questions, we can systematically figure out who we should or should not date!